Today began my annual silent row with the butcher. He knows that I passionately object to his advertising Christmas turkeys in October and I know that he's not keen either but thinks he must or else Tesco will get there first. I understand his business needs and he understands my liturgical objections, yet nonetheless here we are again silently growling at each other.

"What would happen," I have tried to explain to him, "If you said to a Muslim person 'Happy Eid' before the fast of Ramadan had even begun? They would look at you as quite bonkers and I feel the same when you effectively offer me a Christmas greeting months before the start of Advent!"

"Be that as it may Reverence, I don't know anything about Eid - not much call for it round these parts. What I do know is that my profit's all made in December these days and blowed if I'm going to be left with an empty till because you wish we still lived in 1306 and not 2006."

Such will be his reply and what can I say but fair point well made....

...And so to bed, though pray God not to dream I am a trying to preach a sermon on Christmas Day and only making turkey gobbling noises!