'The Massage is the Message'

...Rather disappointingly, considering one's hoped for eventual place as a footnote in literary history, one has discovered that the pertinent phrase 'The Massage is the Message' has already been coined.

Nonetheless, not having previously encountered this re-working of Marshall McLuhan's great dictum, I shall claim a certain originality of thought in announcing that that is precisely what one has come to realise is so prevalent - and so morally corrosive - in our public life.

This morning, on the Home Service, a Police Constable was reporting how 'The Massage is the Message' has become embedded in his service with terrible consequence. He said that he and his colleagues were 'not allowed' to arrest people (generally young men of course) for public order offences as these would count as 'violent crime' - a figure that must go down say the political masters. They were instructed that such persons should be arrested for being 'drunk and disorderly' instead, that not being classified as a violent crime and therefore allowable.

Similar instructions were to attempt, where remotely possible, not to report a break-in to someone's home as a 'burglary' - another figure that must not rise - but, instead, to stripe it down as 'damage to property', which is not a KPI. (If you are not aware of what a KPI is then I shall not blight your life by telling you, merely remarking that you should count yourself as one of the blessed.)

That there are person's brave and moral enough publicly to denounce this perverse tactic is a matter of some hope for the world. That though the system - Bro. Charles once more - demands it of them that they behave so badly, most certainly is not.

I have nothing against a good massage when delivered by a laconic Turkish specialist in the dread art - or even the lighter touch of the sort of New Age healer that H would prefer - but blowed if I'm content for massage to become the whole message.